Hell freezes over: Rocky Horrible Wins

Rocky Horrible: Two words, one team. Pure, unadulterated genius. Well, at least for one night. After tireless months of authentically horrible trivia performances, Rocky Horrible was able to pull out the unthinkable: they won first place at Old Chicago trivia. “They obviously cheated” you boldly suggest. And you may be right, but I doubt it. You see, the members of Rocky Horrible are all about class and dignity: They never interrupt me or use profane language during the game, nor do they ever make obvious, sophomoric sexual references while reacting to questions. They’re just a group of honest, intelligent and gracious competitors; a team that would never think to complain bitterly at the end of every game about how they were cheated, or casually remind me of how stupid and unattractive I am. No, they’re just nice guys and gals who finally got what they deserved: first place. Well done, rocky Horrible, well done. As for the rest of the teams…what the deuce? Sure, the Unluckiest Focks got second, but they can do that in their sleep?! On a lighter note, John the Bartender created the most disgusting drink to date, which I assume Old Chicago will implement in their spring menu. In all, it was a historic night and one that most of you have probably already forgotten…except, of course, for Rocky Horrible, who will never forget what it felt like to be a champion.

First: Rocky Horrible: 45

Second: The Most Unluckiest Focks: 42

Third: Everyone Else: < 42